Jason
We hiked in silence. We drove to the hike in silence.
There was a moment when I thought reaching out to you would bring us closer together. And then there was her. There was the her from the iPhone that got in the way. The her that made me think, what the fuck are you even about. You actually follow Kylie Jenner on Twitter... holy shit where did you come from? That repelled me... the final thing that made me judge that pushed me away from you. The thing that tossed me into another place and made the silence begin.
I simply couldn't figure out how to get out of the silence. I couldn't figure out how to crawl out of the hole. I would make a comment. You would make a comment. But nothing. It's as if the final strand was broken. It was as if the final tenuous delicate little tie that held us together broke. We shouldn't have gone hiking.
I know you hated it. You wanted me to believe that you liked the outdoors. That hiking was your thing. Nightclubs, drinking, socializing, drugs, sarcasm, social media, rap & laughing... those are your things. hiking was not. but hiking we went. It was as if you had to prove something to me. to prove that you were like me. that you were open to being and enjoying something I did.
We drove in silence. you didn't play rap.
We hiked in silence. we tried to connect about the dirt, and sky, and flowers, and grass and lovely day and "are we lost" but we simply couldn't. The connection was lost.
And so we hiked until we were done. It was a death march into the mountains.
And then we drove in silence. And ate in silence. I'm sorry that I made you feel so bad about ordering my food incorrectly. I'm sorry. I saw how that hurt you. But you were done. We were done by that time.
We walked in silence. We shopped in silence.
We drove home to 728 Jamestown Avenue in silence. We picked up your things and then we drove to 66 Divisidero
And then we were not silent....
"You are so quiet."
"I guess there is nothing to be said"
"I suppose it's not a surprise to you that this isn't working for me"
"No"
"When I think about a future. a relationship into the future I can't imagine it with you."
"that's fine"
Silence.
"Goodbye"
There was a moment when I thought reaching out to you would bring us closer together. And then there was her. There was the her from the iPhone that got in the way. The her that made me think, what the fuck are you even about. You actually follow Kylie Jenner on Twitter... holy shit where did you come from? That repelled me... the final thing that made me judge that pushed me away from you. The thing that tossed me into another place and made the silence begin.
I simply couldn't figure out how to get out of the silence. I couldn't figure out how to crawl out of the hole. I would make a comment. You would make a comment. But nothing. It's as if the final strand was broken. It was as if the final tenuous delicate little tie that held us together broke. We shouldn't have gone hiking.
I know you hated it. You wanted me to believe that you liked the outdoors. That hiking was your thing. Nightclubs, drinking, socializing, drugs, sarcasm, social media, rap & laughing... those are your things. hiking was not. but hiking we went. It was as if you had to prove something to me. to prove that you were like me. that you were open to being and enjoying something I did.
We drove in silence. you didn't play rap.
We hiked in silence. we tried to connect about the dirt, and sky, and flowers, and grass and lovely day and "are we lost" but we simply couldn't. The connection was lost.
And so we hiked until we were done. It was a death march into the mountains.
And then we drove in silence. And ate in silence. I'm sorry that I made you feel so bad about ordering my food incorrectly. I'm sorry. I saw how that hurt you. But you were done. We were done by that time.
We walked in silence. We shopped in silence.
We drove home to 728 Jamestown Avenue in silence. We picked up your things and then we drove to 66 Divisidero
And then we were not silent....
"You are so quiet."
"I guess there is nothing to be said"
"I suppose it's not a surprise to you that this isn't working for me"
"No"
"When I think about a future. a relationship into the future I can't imagine it with you."
"that's fine"
Silence.
"Goodbye"
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