the wall is too high


i thought I was the open minded one.  i thought i was the one who was accepting.  i thought i was the one who celebrated differences.  i thought it wouldn't be a big deal that we were/are so different.  i thought that living closer would be easier.  i hadn't counted on the guilt i feel for not driving the 2.5 hours to see you.  i thought that it wouldn't bother me.  

the reality is that... 

i don't want to see you.  
i don't want to spend time with you.  
i don't enjoy your company.  
i don't celebrate those things you celebrate. 
i don't support your political decisions.  
i don't understand your political decisions.  
i don't understand why the differences in sex are defined in your world.  
i don't understand why you are so afraid.  
i don't understand how you've lost your interest in life.  
i don't understand why you hide behind your church and pastor.  
i don't understand why you don't have an opinion of your own.  
i don't understand how you can be so filled with hate for those who have a different skin color than you.  
i don't understand how you seemingly don't have principles any longer.  

i don't understand.


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